In Which I Realize That I Shouldn't Try to Speak Russian with Everyone

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Me, in a bar last night: Oh, excuse me. I'm looking for my friend's purse.
Guy One of Three: Where are you from?
Me: From New York. I'm sorry, I'm just trying to find this purse. But where are you from?
Guy One of Three, Lying: Spain.
Me: ...Spain? Okay. And you?
Guy Two of Three: From Armenia.
Me, in Russian, because this is who I am now, apparently: Do you speak Russian?
Guys One, Two, and Three: Yes! You speak Russian?
Me: Yes. I studied it in my university. I'm here in Germany studying Russian history.
Guy One of Three (faux Spaniard): I could teach you perfect Russian.
Me: ...Ok. I'm going to try to find my friend's purse.
Guy One of Three, reaching for my hair: You are beautiful and perfect.
Me: Gotta go find a purse.

cristeen likes this
blackseablogging said: But you are beautiful and perfect! In any language. Only a close second to sochni.
etwritehome posted this

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